Thoughts About Mum
Getting used to a chronic medical condition is a different road for everyone. Finding ways to cope and have quality of life will depend on a person's attitude and outlook.
Some of what I call the 'lucky ones' have a nice, accepting personality. They are confident with life itself, some are secure in their beliefs - these are the ones that seem to cruise and don't really seem to complain much.
My Mum was one of the above. A chronic diabetic, she developed other conditions as she got older. It got to the stage where she wanted to move on.
One day we were talking and I mentioned it would be her birthday soon.
'No more birthdays, please' she said.
My efforts to lighten the situation and maybe (force) give some incentive to stay on this side of the mortal coil were obviously noted but she needed to tell me how it was.
She was ready to go. The doctor gave the news that should Mum go into some type of arrest - there would be no effort to revive - considering all the problems that had now arisen.
She took my face in her hands and asked me if I was alright.
'Yes' I said...'Are you?'
'Yes' she said, smiling at me.
I climbed into bed with her, we cuddled for a long time and told each other 'I love you'.
Then we got quiet and just held each other. Years earlier we had made our peace with all kinds of real and imagined slights - we had got everything out of the way that may have caused grief for whoever was left in the end.
We had a kind of different attitude on life - we had already buried two of her sons (my brothers).
My Mum - whose best friend was my Dad, surprisingly turned to me at this time. There are lots of reasons for this which I won't go into but I can't help thinking that after all she had taught me through life she was now showing/teaching me one way to move on.
I just hope I'll have my marbles and be as brave as she.
252609 - 2023-07-18 07:39:39