Being Hired As A Mother

It can seem that being a mother isn't valued a great deal by today's society. A mother who is not in the paid work force is likely to say, somewhat apologetically, 'I am just a mother' when asked, 'What do you do?' She may dread the question as she feels it isn't enough to be a mother and if her children are at school she may feel she should have a job.

Parents play a vital role in a child's formative years. Once a child has become independent and leaves home his/her parents still have an important role to play.

Some young adults do not have a close connection with their parents due to family problems. Some live a long way from their parents and are unable to have regular contact. Others find their parents are not readily available due to high pressure jobs. Sometimes their parents have passed away.

What can a young person do if he/she really wants the help and support of a parent but is unable to get that support? In some places it is now possible to hire a parent.

I read about a woman in her early sixties living in New York who has set up a business hiring herself out as a mother. It is nothing new to pay someone to do the housework, pick up the dry cleaning and organise dinner parties. Paying for a substitute mother to listen to your problems, watch a movie with you or accompany you when you go shopping for furniture is a modern thing.

There are young adults who are living in New York, often doing high pressured jobs and they are a long way from home. They may have friends their own age for socialising with but sometimes they just need a mother.

A mother for hire can listen without making judgement or comparing the young person to his/her siblings. She won't be lying awake at night worrying about her son/daughter so the young person doesn't feel guilty about offloading their problems.

Perhaps it would be better to see a trained counsellor to discuss some problems. However, a hired mother is likely to get out the home made 'cookies' and a counsellor isn't. Sometimes perhaps all that is needed is someone to listen without follow up therapy. Those homemade treats do sound comforting when someone is a long way from home.

How lucky a person is if he/she has the support of their own mother. A mother for hire may be the second best thing and perhaps have one or two small advantages. However, there is nothing like the support of a mother, grandmother or other very close family member. The memories of time with this person will always be so special, even when one has children and grandchildren of one's own.

If some young people are willing to pay for someone to act as a mother it shows how much they need this support. If you are a mother, think about this the next time you say you are 'just a mother'. If you have a paid job as well as a mother role, don't underestimate your job as a mother.


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