Image: The Secret Facebook Page. Relationships can really amplify your happiness, like a bug that spreads. Make this cool bug pleasant.
We're now three quarters of the way through the Self Avenue Happiness Project. In case you've only just discovered Self Avenue, I am now giving you the opportunity to catch up on the other eight articles in this 12-part series:
A great sense of community enables one to enjoy meaningful and fruitful relationships with other people. All encompassing relationships with others from working to love based is a sure fire way to boost one's happiness levels. The more we're able to relate to other people, the happier we are. Relationships are built with loved one's, as well as with acquaintances. A patient goes and sees a doctor - that is a relationship. Irrespective of the duration of such relationships, they're still relationships.
In business, you must give more in use value to your clients than what you're receiving in cash value. Expectantly, your business/work will take off in this situation. No different to relationships. The more you give, the more you receive. Adding value to all of your relationships in boosting your happiness in life means to:
Be present in the relationship. For example, when you're having lunch with your partner - just focus solely on them instead of on your next appointment.
Listening to the other person, showing empathy and providing support where needed.
Be responsible for yourself and for your own actions.
Now I have an exercise for you to complete. Write this down: identify the people in your life that give you energy - those who are optimistic, happy and possess a positive attitude in life. Who are these people in your life? Make it an absolute priority to spend more time with them.
On the flip side, now it is time to write down and identify those people who exude some negative energy in your life. Can you accept these people for who they are - depending on the relationship of course? Can you let go of the un-constructive feelings you have for them in order for you to experience more happiness in that relationship? How can you take control of your happiness in that relationship? Can you let go of these relationships - cut the cord metaphorically?
Now think about your loved ones - your partner, family and closest friends. How do they make you feel when you're with them? Why do you love them?
Write these thoughts down. The above exercise will help you deepen your connections with them, especially as you're focusing on the great things about them. Ask quality questions. Really get present and listen to the answers that come up. With loved ones:
Give your time, energy and respect to them.
Show appreciation, interest and support.
Always be integral and honest with them.
Take time out to be with them. Even if it is having coffee with your partner for only 10 minutes. This time is precious, and is living proof that real effort has been made on both ends to make such catch ups possible.
Have a generous heart.
Gratitude is everything - from the friend that made the effort to catch up with you for coffee, to the postman that delivered your Valentine's Day card to your partner. These little things add immense amounts of happiness to your relationships.
With the most important people in your life - what do you love and admire about them? What have you learnt from and/or are able to learn about them? How do you, and/or can you add value into their life? What can you give them?
"It's amazing where I'm standing, there's a lot that we can give. This is ours just for the moment, there's a lot that we can give." - a verse from the song Life is Beautiful by Vega4.
Let go of anything that can put a dent on your relationships, taking all of the above into account. relationships and life is just delicious when combined fruitfully.
Other ways to build your important relationships include:
Send thank you notes.
Encouraging your parents to share more of their childhood with you.
Showing some old school and baby photos to your partner.
These are just some ideas that build your wonderful relationships with those important people in your life, and hence as a by-product of this will boost your happiness levels. Enjoy the journey. Have a wonderful week, and I'll publish Part 10 of this series on having more time out for yourself next week.