When you look into their eyes and they smile back at you, there is no other feeling in the world quite like it. Image source: morguefile.com
There is a love out there. A special love. It's a bond so amazing and so wonderful that nothing comes close in comparison. You try to prepare yourself and others try to explain it to you beforehand, however you cannot really get it; really grasp that concept until you experience it for yourself. It's a miracle really, and like with all miracles it's hard to explain. I am talking about the love parents feel for their child.
With a background in childcare, I thought I always loved children. Over the years I became close to them and their families. I felt so important and so blessed when they loved me back; and for when they missed me when I wasn't there, and when they made me gifts. Nothing could prepare me for my own. That feeling of extreme responsibility of a newborn coupled with that new born baby smell, soft skin and silky wisps of hair. When they curl their whole hand around your finger, and when they turn towards the sound of your voice. It is the sweetest and most natural love of all.
It is a love such as this that causes fully independent and powerful adults to become consumed by insecurity, and concerns of health and safety for their precious offspring. We don't want them hurt, taken away, threatened or ill. We wish to keep the bad people away, and create almost a bubble of calm around them. It's natural and beautiful, however it easily causes us to feel stress and alarm.
Despite the fact that this love is incredibly strong, it doesn't make it easy. In fact it's the hardest job in the world. You love this tiny human being who will continue to grow up; need you less and less; treat you awfully at times, and will grow up leaving the nest to live their own life. It goes so fast. In fact too fast. One minute they are being fed in your arms, and the next they are asking for the car keys. Like the saying goes: "A mother holds her child's hand for a little while but their heart forever."
On days when the house is a mess, you haven't got a thing done. The whinging and screaming has given you a headache, and you feel low and begin to wonder why you had these children in the first place. That's when you need a reminder. A reminder of the love you feel for that child, and of the love they feel for you.
Here are some reminders to assist you when you are not feeling the love:
1) To your child you are their world. Even if you said no to that lolly or toy. Even if they have been a nightmare all day.
2) Children are a gift. We are so lucky to have them.
3) Loving them and doing your best is all that matters.
4) Like The Beatles said, 'All you need is love'. 5) Needing help and asking for help doesn't mean you love your child/children less.
6) You will always be their parent, no matter what happens in the future. No one can take that away from you.
7) They love you back no matter what. They don't care if you're not dressed yet; if your hair is messy or if the house isn't clean.
8)This is a love that lasts forever.
1) Enjoy lots of time together with your child/children, and as a family.
2) Kiss and hold their hands while they still want you to, and while you still can.
3) Enjoy each moment. They are over so fast.
4) Take lots of photos and keep a diary of those heartfelt moments so they will never be forgotten.
5) Look deep into your child's eyes every night and every morning, and tell them that you love them.
6) Get involved in their play, even if it's embarrassing.
7) Celebrate this love and treasure it. Praise your children in front of others, and let them know that you will always support them for the rest of your days, no matter what.