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So Where Are All The People Who Were Playing Pokemon Go

by zyana (follow)
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Playing game on phone


Remember Pokémon go? Yea… that new fad on the block that drove everyone crazy because it was ooh –so-healthy and ooh-so-social. Funny you don’t see people playing the game anymore. Where’d everybody go?

In the hospital

Yea… that’s right! They were probably running across the street trying to catch a rare Pokémon and didn’t bother looking at the traffic from either side! And then out of nowhere, came a suspicious looking black limo with black tinted windows and knocked them to the side. So probably a couple of bleeding bruises or broken bones, or death in the worst case. Oh dear! Anyway, I thought we enjoy playing social games because we can play them while in our comfort zone, not because we would have to run around the city catching weird little pocket monsters. Hmm maybe nearby urgent care facilities should’ve been Pokéstops instead!

Somewhere in the gym

So they went into the gym because it was a Pokéstop, but never came out! Maybe they realized that lifting some weights or running on the treadmill actually does more for improving their health instead of sitting on the bench and glaring at their smartphone screen. Well duh, there’s a big difference between actually exercising and sitting on your bum! Or maybe their pocket monster fetish got replaced by looking-at-naked-bodies fetish. Oooh… so hot! But I have a question for the devs of the game; why would you even make Pokéstops at the gym when the only time people take out their cellphones is when they want to take half nude selfies? P.s cellphones and sweat, not the best of combinations!

In their rooms

Let’s admit it; social games are essentially for some very unsocial people who are constantly glued to their cellphones and who do not wish to be disturbed. This species is most often found looked in their bastions of solitude, and rarely make a public appearance. The only time they are seen is when they are headed for the toilet, or when they’re going out to catch Pokémon. And now that the game has reached a dead end and lost its charm, they have receded to their sanctuaries and are nowhere to be seen again. What a social experience!

Far far away
And if they’re still hooked onto the game, then maybe they’ve gone on a really long road trip – on foot, so that they can even catch rarer Pokémon. And if this is the case, well then, good for them, you could probably do a lot more with some less productive pocket monster addicts in your life! Good riddance!


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