Home    Subscribe    Write for Us    FAQ    Contact    HubGarden    Login

Looking For Praise

by Marie Vonow (follow)
Blogs:https://minamaries.blogspot.com.au https://simpleselfimprovement.blogspot.com.au/
Approval (6)      Praise (6)      Childhood (4)      Believe (2)     


Approval, Believe, Childhood, Praise
Image: Marie Vonow

It is nice when others give us praise, acknowledge our efforts and say we are doing a good job. However, it is more important that we believe we are doing the best we can under whatever circumstances we are in.

There are those who believe adults praising children can have negative effects. When adults praise children, which is an accepted practice, the intention is usually to improve self esteem. However, some child experts believe praise can manipulate children to do what adults want. It can decrease internal motivation for a child. It can also lessen their sense of achievement because they are depending on praise from adults. If they do not get that praise they are likely to feel their efforts aren’t good enough.

Children may avoid making their own judgements because they want to please the adults in their life. They may not try something different because they don’t know if it will be approved of. I certainly remember doing things to continue getting praise from my teachers when I was a young child. One day the teacher praised the smiling face I had put on my drawing of the sun. I continued to put a smiley face on the sun, desiring continued praise.

This need for praise from others can continue into adulthood. We may become ‘people pleasers’ or find it difficult to say, ‘No’. We may avoid expressing a different opinion from that expressed by others. We may doubt our capabilities and feel inadequate.

When we do get approval and praise we may crave more, becoming what has been referred to as ‘praise junkies’. If we don’t get praise and awards we feel discouraged. We may feel it isn’t worth bothering or we may doubt ourselves.

There are many things one will do which won’t be acknowledged by anyone and this can make one feel unappreciated. These negative feelings may go back to that need for approval and praise experienced in childhood.

Sometimes others won’t give us the praise we desire. Perhaps they criticise what we have done. It can be hurtful to have one’s cooking, creative endeavours or a project undertaken in the workplace criticised. Even comments made as ‘constructive criticism’ can damage our confidence.

Whatever we do, it won’t be met by approval from everyone. Perhaps we have put lots of time and effort into something. Others may believe it should have been done differently. Some may be jealous or feel insecure because they feel it makes them look inadequate. There may be numerous reasons why we don’t get the praise we feel we have earned. It is important we are happy with what we have done rather than depending on accolades from others.

Sometimes there may be room for improvement. Criticism may make us depressed, embarrassed or defensive. It may be hard to accept suggestions or offers to help one get it right.

At times it really doesn’t matter if something isn’t done as well as some would like. There are plenty of times when, ‘Near enough is good enough’. Perhaps you have too many responsibilities and others need to help out. Perhaps others have unrealistic expectations.

When you have been brought up to value approval and praise from others it is difficult to get past this and believe your own opinion of what you do is what matters. Only you know what you can manage as you attempt to get balance in your life. It is your life. You need to believe in yourself instead of depending on praise from others.


# Approval
# Believe
# Childhood
# Praise
I like this Article - 3
More Articles by Marie Vonow
Some aspects of what is considered good manners have changed over the last few decades
129 views
The ‘flight or fight’ reaction is often mentioned when talking about how humans respond to stres...
77 views
Purple is a colour traditionally associated with royalty and luxury
113 views
Having plans and setting goals to improve aspects of one’s life can certainly be useful
263 views
With another long weekend on the horizon I got talking to a young woman about ways to spend the br...
171 views
About eighteen months ago I decided to see if I could manage without a car
160 views
view all articles by Marie Vonow
Articles by Marie Vonow on Other Hubs
While many people long to be in a long term relationship, there are those who have such an overwhe...
180 views
ID: 36851
[ Submit a Comment ]
Trending Articles
One day you are off to work in a busy office as you have been doing for the past five years or lon...
356 views
In this day and age, many people hire professional escorts because they what to try something ne...
12729 views
If you do a Google search you will find plenty of quotes on the topic of happiness
134 views
New words are constantly coming into existence
215 views
Many of us fear to speak our mind because we care about what others might think of us or say abo...
6838 views
Be proud of yourself - praise yourself and you will find yourself becoming the person you want to b...
449 views
Sometimes it is difficult to feel motivated
129 views
According to Wikipedia, **research** is 'creative and systematic work undertaken to increase the ...
122 views
When people hear the word 'amnesia' they worry because they know it means forgetting things and th...
205 views
A healthy family environment does more than create a safe space for children to grow up
155 views
Categories
 
Copyright 2012-2021 OatLabs ABN 18113479226. mobile version