Was I ashamed?
No. I didn't do it. His choice to muck around and not get things seen to.
No. I wasn't the first to have a kid in jail and won't be the last.
No. Was happy I'd done my best as a parent.
No. He's an adult. His life.
But I didn't love him any less and wanted to see him.
Justified everything in my head to allow myself to. Didn't hurt anyone, didn't steal anything. I could live with that.
So I changed the rules and went to see him.
You came! (Happy expression.) Why?
To tell you to pay your bloody fines in future.
I went back on what I'd said. Changed the rules. Will visit once - and that's it.
Lessons from this story
Sometimes you act differently than you think you would have.
Changing your mind on something is okay - if you can live with it.
Learned long ago not to take the blame for others, or take on more guilt than is warranted - took a while.
Thank you for your kind words :) This happened a while back - had plenty of time to mull it over. Taking things in stride is a lot easier than trying to fight them.
Mina, a mother never knows what she will do when it comes down to her child.
Everyone acts differently. I can't speak from personal experiences in a parents side but I can sympathise.
Even though the content is personal to you, I still found it beautifully written and very heartfelt.
Hope everything goes well for the future.