Wedded bliss is a beautiful experience. The happiness to wake up next to your life partner. There is not a better start to a day. Each day, every moment of marriage is a celebration of a coupleís love and life together. through good times and in bad.
Marriage should not be treated like it is a burden or inconvenience - particularly when times are tough. When couples have issues to work through, it is a lot easier to work together towards a common goal as opposed to being against each other. However, we donít live in a perfect world - nor would it be healthy to have an amicable agreement all the time. Each person in a marriage is an individual, and is entitled to express their own opinions, wishes and desires.
If a married couple experience a differing opinion; instead of fighting each person should listen to the other express their opinion, and never lose sight of what they are trying to achieve. Inevitably, each of them is not looking for a bad outcome. A bit of give and take can be helpful to determine a conclusion to many issues. Just be sure that one person is not always giving, and the other always taking.
Respect and with it, honesty and fidelity are other keys to maintaining a happy marriage. With respect comes a sense of worthiness, caring, and of course love. Respect is both physical and emotive. With honesty and fidelity, respect towards each other expounds the sanctity of what marriage truly is.
With our day to day lives being so busy, we can become consumed in ourselves and/or our jobs, and then we have the added distractions such as social media, financial issues or other addictions. Married couples need to be supportive of one another and invest the time in their marriage. Having a common interest or participating in each otherís hobbies are great ways to start. The benefits of investing time in a marriage is not only felt by the couple, but by the whole family - whether they are children or extended family. A happy marriage is also aided by the support of family and friends. Having good role models such as parents, grandparents, uncles and aunties, or even close friends can prove inspirational to married couples.
Have you ever walked down a street or been in the park, and have witnessed a couple walking along holding hands? In todayís world this is a rare scene. We are often too scared to show affection towards each other.
The law courts (and the legal system generally) provides a bitter end to what people originally thought would be a lifetime of happiness. Sure, people may say that they are given an opportunity for a new beginning, but what happened along the way to the promise that they made? Do people become complacent? Is it just an easier solution to part ways, rather than stay together and try to work things out? It may be that some people did not have the right intention or complete understanding of what marriage is when they made their wedding promises. By giving up, what example are we showing our children? How are they meant to understand what marriage is if we donít set a good example ourselves?
Wedding vows are intended to be a promise to each other for a lifetime commitment. When considering marriage, a couple should not take it lightly. I donít profess to be a marriage counsellor, nor an expert on marriage. I simply reflect on what I have experienced, and on what I have observed from those within my work, community, family and friends. Prior to marrying my beautiful husband, we each took part in a pre-marital retreat. After over 10 years, we are still able to draw on some of the things we learnt at that same retreat. I would highly recommend couples consider doing some form of pre-marital preparation course/retreat during their engagement.
Whatever the reason is for people to separate or divorce, it is hoped that after reading this article that couples take a look at their marriage in a different light. There is no harm in trying to make things work - or if they are working to make it work better. What have you got to lose? There are no real secrets or remedies on how to make a marriage a happy marriage. A common sense approach, and adapting key elements of marriage such as respect, trust, honesty and fidelity is a good starting point.