Home    Subscribe    Write for Us    FAQ    Contact    HubGarden    Login

Being Imperfect Helps Me Connect

by Marie Vonow (follow)
Chief editor: readyforpets.com Blogs:www.quora.com/profile/Marie-Vonow/blogs Other:www.weekendnotes.com/profile/marie-vonow/
Communication (117)      Confidence (60)      Friends (39)      Friendship (20)      Listening (18)      Perfect (3)      Imperfect (1)     

Mugs On Outdoor Table
Image by Marie Vonow

When I was younger I wished I was perfect. If only I didn't make mistakes, say the 'wrong thing' and have silly fears. If only I had plenty of confidence and was all round 'better'. As I have aged I have come to see that it is my shortcomings and quirks that help me connect with other people.

Many is the time I have found myself talking about my uncertainties with a true friend. She, in turn, has then shared her fears and mistakes with me. If either one of us was perfect (if perfection existed) those conversations wouldn't happen.

Often someone will tell me about a situation or a personal fear which I have not experienced. However, I may have been through or felt something similar enough for me to empathise. If I was perfect, never making mistakes or having doubts, I would have no patience or understanding. It is quite likely the other person wouldn't feel comfortable telling me because they would sense I would have no common ground with them.

Over coffee, a close friend and I will talk about what we perceive as our shortcomings. We will unburden ourselves as we discuss things we are scared of doing and situations that fill us with dread. We might moan about a tendency to buy things we don't really need or a fear of moths and answering the phone.

When I confide my imperfections to someone I trust and she reciprocates, a special bond forms. We trust and understand each other. We do not judge or laugh at the other person. We can relax in the company of each other. Sometimes we may discuss possible ways of handling things. Any suggestions are taken on board more easily when they come from an imperfect friend who understands our insecurities.

What would we talk about if we had no weaknesses, quirks and fears? Yes, there are other things to discuss but they wouldn't make us bond in the same way.

My imperfections, quirks, fears and strange habits actually help me connect with others. I may still feel inadequate and self conscious about these things around people who seem to have no understanding. However, I have come to see my shortcomings help me relate to those around me and I feel closest to people who are willing to admit they are also far from perfect.

# Communication
# Confidence
# Friends
# Friendship
# Imperfect
# Listening
# Perfect
I like this Article - 8
More Articles by Marie Vonow
When I am walking down a street in a shopping area or wandering through a mall I always stop to read...
You are probably asking, ‘What is the fringe car?’ I was walking down our main street this morning t...
Frank Lloyd Wright’ (American architect, writer and educator) wrote, ‘Study nature, love natur...
I feel rich today and it has little to do with money
Body Image is the way we perceive and judge our physical body
Friends are wonderful
view all articles by Marie Vonow
Articles by Marie Vonow on Other Hubs
ID: 42090
[ Submit a Comment ]
Hi Marie,
Great article! Made me realize I am okay just by being me.......Imperfections
and all!
Thanks for your feedback. I think society puts too much emphasis on constantly trying to change ourselves when we are all okay just being ourselves. It's those funny little insecurities and idiosyncrasies that make us individuals. Sometimes it's the very things we are self conscious about that make our true friends love us.
Fine thoughts here, Marie! I glory in my imperfections and the fine connections they have helped to occur.

Thanks Carolyn. I like your expression 'glory in my imperfections'. Rather than just accepting my imperfections in the future I shall glory in them. Thank you.
Yay to you Marie! All humans have imperfections, those who say they have none can be the most imperfect people around, at times.
I so agree with many of your statements, Marie. A beautiful article - thank you.
Justine (Jussiecatwriter)
Thanks for your ongoing support, Justine. I found it a great weight off my shoulders when I started to accept it is okay to be imperfect. I felt even better when I realised my imperfections help me connect.
I can really identify with this article, as I am sure many people can. It makes you realise that we all have more in common that what we realise. Thank you for your articles. They are great.
Thank you very much for your comments. It is lovely to know when readers enjoy my articles. It encourages me to keep writing.
Trending Articles
You may be passionate about writing but still suffer from writer's block
Ever since the new year kicked off, social media channels have been abuzz with "new year, new me...
I hope I can help a friend who thinks he's not living up to social expectations
In this day and age, many people hire professional escorts because they what to try something ne...
No one wants to be that one person others don’t want to introduce their friends to because they’...
You don’t have to be rich to make money, you just have to be practical
Traveling to foreign countries can be one of the most exciting and fulfilling things you’ll ever...
It’s a familiar story
People generally don’t want to feel sad or have their feelings hurt
Featured on Other Hubs
Copyright 2012-2017 On Topic Media PTY LTD. ABN 18113479226. mobile version