Kids recipes; sleeping techniques that have worked; partners support, and the role of a mother are some of the questions I asked young mothers in putting this feature together. Up, close and live...exciting interviews with mothers like you, who are the real celebrities today. For a change, instead of wondering, I decided to ask young mothers across the globe to understand what they really feel, and how they are being the super women that they are. Read on for some very interesting answers, genuine thoughts and messages for all partners and mothers.
Art : In one word, please tell me "Being a mother is --
Mothers: Sit back and have fun.You have earned it. A day to show mothers the love and respect for the sacrifices mothers make.
• Without mums, we are not here in this world, so I personally feel she should not be celebrated just on that day alone.
• Having a mum and being a mum - more than even birthdays, Mothers Day should be celebrated with pomp and splendour. I want my mum to be the happiest, and I want my child to think the same as well.
• A Day to say thanks to all the women who handle this difficult task so easily.
• I am not sure what we are trying to achieve. Expression of love is a natural process, and there shouldn't be only one day to do that.
Art: How do you handle your child when he/she screams in a mall?
• Just say a firm no with our eyes rather than create a scene reacting to their actions.
• I always distract him and take him away from all the activity in the mall to a quiet corner and give him my attention.
• I struggle to keep my temper low...try to talk politely and make them understand. If that fails, give in to their tantrum.
• Uhhh…. This is a biggy. It is quite difficult to remain calm and not see red! Sometimes, me looking firmly and straight into her eyes and counting 1-10 calms her down.
Art: Is there any specific role uniquely for mothers in the upbringing of children?
• Apart from integrity and love, respect for people and things around.The lesson to use only what you need, and give back as much as you can.
• We should be an example and an inspiration to our kids, and not be a venture for them to learn from us, as they watch us and grow.
• Yes there are a few things that uniquely fall into a mothers lap. They are integrity which includes honestly, and being true to yourself if not to anybody. Fathers being not so demonstrative, I think its mothers who have to teach them about love and expressing it. When they are taught to express more, their lives and their relationships will be better. These two should definitely come from a mum, because she is the one who nurtures the child.
• Mothers, being almost always the right-brained parent, play a very important role in teaching a child to love unconditionally; to express true feelings, and also the values of staying together as a family.
• Without doubt, more than anyone else. There is a natural and a unique bond between the mother and child. A mothers’ love, affection and nurturing contributes tremendously towards their physical and mental wellbeing.
Art: Do you believe as a mother, teaching a child about respecting a women is important, or is it something they observe from fathers and society?
• Yes, respect for women should start at the home. Fathers should teach their sons to respect women and their daughters to demand respect from their boyfriend, friend, and everyone around her.
• Yes women should be respected and taught their importance. Violence against any women is a big no in the society which fathers should actually teach the kids.
• Am sure the fathers do a good job at that, but in context of many things, the father might lose the importance. We all know that mothers are the most important people, and every child should be able to see and understand. Even when the mother makes a mistake, mothers should be able to analyse and see why she has done that without judgement.
• Yes definitely, but more than teaching, I believe we ourselves should respect other women so that kids can observe and learn more from mothers, and then society.
• As a mother, I think, irrespective of gender, my child must be able to respect every individual and learn to look beyond their weaknesses. For a young child, it’s all monkey see, monkey do. As parents, we teach a newborn to use their mirror neurons early on, and to learn and do simple actions that we do.
• It is both the mother and fathers’ utmost responsibility to teach their child social skills, and one of the most important ones is to respect and treat other human beings the same way they like to be treated. Having said that, if you only preach and don’t practice, kids will pick that!
Art: What is the most challenging (if any )part of being a mother?
• Everything about raising a child, and the fact that you only get one chance to do this, and I question myself every time as to whether or not I am doing the right thing.
• Every aspect of being a mother is a challenging period.
• It was easy for me to get overwhelmed in attending to my daughters’ needs that I sometimes forget the needs of my partner. Also, with your hands full with something or the other, it is very easy to forget what I need/want sometimes. Balance to everything is the key, and the most challenging part of being a mother or a father.
• Being a very protective mother, for the sake of my child, I do have to let my child go so that he can grow. Watching my little baby grow and become an individual involves giving him the opportunity to face his fears and uncertainties. This is very challenging, especially as I want to hold my child close and shield him from all the bad in the world.
• Trying to understand what your kid wants.
Art: How supportive is your partner?
• Hahahahaha...I would have laughed more if I had some wine. On a scale of 1 to 10 he is a negative 100.
• Extremely supportive. He does not give me the opportunity to ask for help, he is always there.
• Very supportive partner, who can very effectively play the role of the mother in my absence.
Art: Is there any message for all the partners out there on being a mother?
• Being in a character called mother is the most important, and the difficult task to be accomplished without a bug report. Rather than accusing the wives for everything regarding their kids, be empathetic.
• Hats off to the single mothers, but for partners learn to change diapers. Not knowing how to change diapers is no excuse.
• In my opinion, if a father can offer all that he has, and put on a mum’s hat when in need, there is no more to ask or wish for.
Art: What food/recipes do you recommend for mothers to try for fussy kids?
• As a mother, you always want to make sure that you child gets the veggies and fruits. My son went through a phase where only finger foods worked. I used to make veggie and fruit muffins, arancini balls and pasta bakes in muffin trays etc.
• Another hard question, because every child is different. From my experience, all I can say is keep trying different things and keep at it. Kids low on some vitamins could have a low appetite. When I put my daughter on multivitamins, she started eating properly.
• Food guys, I have no idea. I am looking forward to what other mums suggest.
Art: Any sleeping techniques that have worked on your child that you would like to share?
• Listening to music.
• Routine is one single word. Till our daughter was 10 months she woke up five times at night. Now she sleeps through, just because we set a routine and followed it like clockwork. If your child is not sleeping through the night after a year, you are the problem! Find what you are doing wrong, and fix it now. Because they need uninterrupted sleep to grow well - both in the mind, as well as in the body.
• Well I try to keep calm.
• A time where I do not give in to their tantrums. Discipline is the only that works.
• I try to keep the surrounding quiet with less lighting. It is very important.
Art: Have you ever had a breaking point? If so how do you handle it?
• Yes by being patient when everyone complains or compares your kid with theirs when competing in competitions and boasting about their own kids. Every child is inborn with talents that can be only felt and brought out through being their mum, but not necessarily shown in public competitions. All 5 fingers are not the same.
• I have. When you ignore your needs continuously for many months, the pressure builds without your knowledge, and it did for me. I recognised it before it was too late, and spoke about it to my partner and took a break. Now I strive for balance and it helps.
• Oh Yes. I think that helps me. Once in a while I need to vent out, be loud, and be able to scream.
• Every moment of every day. When I see unclean dishes all over the house, and food all over the place...yeah I am not even thinking about the kids room at that time.
Art: Being a mother today, is there anything you think about in retrospect?
• I used to complain that my life was busy, and it was not even 50% of what it is now.
• Not actually. At every point, my partner and I kept our communication lines open. We discussed and made decisions together, keeping in mind the best outcomes for everyone. We strive to do the best we can, given the circumstances. So I do not see a need to retrospect.
Art: If you have one message for your son/daughter, what is it?
• Never forget the people who had been with us at hard times, and do not forget the help they've done for us.
• I will love him right up to the moon and back.
• Be what you are, and I will always love you.
• Be well, be free, and be mindful of others around you. Follow your heart and fly high!
• I love you no matter who you become.
Art: Finally, how useful are sites like selfavenue.com to you as a mother. Do you find some time to read?
• Rarely find time, but when I find time, Self Avenue is absolutely thought provoking and interesting.
• Not much time to read but when I do find some time, Self Avenue has sometimes made me feel I am not alone.
• I honestly don’t find time to read in depth. Self Avenue Avenue is good.
Well expressed and applies to every mom in the world. Reading something like this unburdens the frustrating thoughts of every mother. Helps to know people understand. Thanks for being our spokesperson.